This procedure thing that my Doctor started me on is slowly coming into a life all its own. I’m finding structure in things I never knew had any structure to them. And that’s been a lot of fun so far. I think I’ll write a bunch of these procedures down. And see what I can do to use them more creatively, and more constructively.
Procedure : Using a To Do list.
1. Make of list of things to get done.
2. Start with the first item on the list, and the old Nike shoes saying. “Just do it.”
3. After each item, give yourself a reward.
4. Don’t worry about finishing the list in one step.
5. Don’t worry about finishing the list in one day.
6. Use completing items on the list to rebuild your self-confidence, and self-image.
7. Don’t tell anyone what you accomplished. Let them find out on their own.
8. At the end of the day, review the list. And think positively about all the things you actually did get done.
And there’s the basic outline. Simple as it is. That “to do” list is not meant to be a destructive thing. It’s not meant to be punishment. It’s not meant to overwhelm. It’s not meant to be a list of “here’s what a grown up would do”. Nope. It’s not about any of that. At all.
This is all about, “How can I do something positive? That will make me feel better. That will help me through another day. That will give me something to smile about.” It’s meant to be constructive. To help me see that I can do things in a positive way. And that I’m not a worthless being that was thrown away by the people I once knew.
One step at a time.
One day at a time.
I’m finding my way in this new life I’ve been given.
My Soul's Tears 